I'm that weak?

Today,whole day let people scold and nag while I was driving. While driving,my tears already nearly came out.

He which mean is my dad said I'm a failure. Driving can't do well,studies also not good enough,attitude got problems,even my walking also problem. Am I really that weak or a problematic person?

Until dinner also said I'm a retard and stupid. Just because I asked him have you ordered my drink and I could not hear just repeat one more time. After dinner came back home still continue scolding and saying. I promised myself not to cry so easily but I fail.

Can say that today whole day I'm full of tears not a good day for me since this morning. Furthermore, recently my mind is full of problem which haven't or cannot be solved. Though for most of yall is easy. but for me is a fear!

When going back from the mall to my college as he already arrived to pick me up. I'm starting to frustrated in chinese which mean is fan. Why my life is seem to be rush? Meeting up my hubby rush,study rush,do things rush and etc.

The worst part is even just now I took a nap during in the afternoon and I had a dream. The dream somehow is most likely similar to my life also full of RUSH! WHY?
Even I sleep and my dream could not be peaceful?

I'm having a big headache when I woke up. I realise that I really
have enough.

Except the time when I'm happy during afternoon as can meet my hubby although the time period is short. From there, I only have smile. You bought for me a Fred Perry blouse and you told me when you're doing something you will think about me first.

You asked me, whether am I the same thing too? I did not answer you.
BUT my answer is 'When every time Iim doing anything, I wish you can be by my side and do it together.'

Although this can be happened for a long time or like you tell me not going to happen. I'm think too much only. But actually I really want.

But till night during skype, not fun like during afternoon. More towards argument. Sorry, I thought can talk to you so that can reduce my thinking. But I created more problems for you.